Saturday, May 10, 2014

Out of the darkness

I can't sleep. I have a lot on my mind regarding my current position in life, the people that have lost their battle with depression, and how I can make a difference.  There is an event coming up, I am sure you have heard of it,  called Out of the Darkness.  I would be a horrible voice on suicide prevention if I didn't participate, so of course, I will be providing links for you to sponsor me. I can't say that suicide is 100% off my mind, but it is only a random thought these days. I am much healthier than I was. The new meds haven't kicked in, but my pain would only rate a 4-6 daily as opposed to the typical 8-10 I was going through.  I still have my limits which cause me shame in my role as a wife and mother, but I am learning to talk down the shame and recognize the strength I really have.
It is true that a person needs a belief to hold on to in order to fight any struggle. Be it drug addiction,  alcoholism,  abuse, depression, and so on. For me, I lost faith in the religion I was brought up in, and I still struggle with turning to that God, when I am so unsure of his existence. However, I do strongly believe in reincarnation and that your actions in this life do directly affect your next journey.  This belief holds me to doing the right thing by everyone,  including myself.  Times get tough. We struggle.  We get through and we grow. The next life will be a breeze. (I am sure at this rate I'll be a princess within the next 2-3 lives.) But if I give up now,  I will continue to suffer each life until I learn to fight. For those of you fighting with depression or any struggle really,  I urge you to look for a beacon of hope, something to hold fast to, be it a God, a loved one,  or a personal goal, just hold on and come out of Darkness with me June 28-29th.


  1. Such heartfelt words and honesty. Fortunately I have never suffered from depression. Although working in a pharmacy I encounter folks who deal with this disease on a daily and lifelong basis. It is difficult to see someone suffer so much. I have never heard of Out of the Darkness, but it sounds as though it provides promise and hope to those who need it. I look forward to learning more about this from you in future posts.
    Visiting from Blogging Addicts.
    Barbara @

  2. I have never heard of Out of the Darkness, but it sounds promising. I hope to learn more soon.